Abra-Bibbidi-Hocus-Presto
by nicrt
Summary: The Paladins are hit with a spell cast by Haggar's latest Robeast. When they return after the fight, Allura and Coran are horrified to discover an unconscious crew. Once out of their healing pods, it seems as if they've all gone feral! Little do they know, the Paladins are all trapped the matrices of their own robot Lions.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Characters/factions/items that were not mentioned in the Voltron franchise belong to me. I do not own any characters/factions/items that do belong to the Voltron franchise (e.g. Voltron Lions, Allura).

 **A/N:** Yay more brainchildren! I thought this might be a fun thing to write. I don't know if I want to head in a crackish direction, or my go to angst one. Maybe both? I can do both? I might do both.

* * *

 **How Many Crab Jokes Can You Make in One Go?**

"Watch your left!" Hunk yelled into his comms' mic, when he saw the Robeast's claw pulling back for a jab.

"Who's left?!" Lance yelled back just as the claw hit him square on his Lion. "Nevermind!"

"Careful Lance!" Shiro ordered, his lion dancing back when the other claw swiped at him. "Everyone spread out, it can't hit us all if we're all over the place."

The five lions dodged more of the Robeasts attacks, a hook there and another grab there. It shrieked in frustration as the pilots outmanoeuvred it. Lance, being the asshole he is, made several trick moves around the monster.

"Can't catch me crabcakes!" He laughed. "Hey Keith, what'd you think of that last move?"

The Red pilot scoffed. "Aren't you cutting it a little close Lance? Don't answer that." He cut the Blue pilot off when he heard an answering intake of breath. "We got it messed up but we're not taking it down anytime soon guys."

"I've got an idea," Pidge replied, popping up on the visual feed. Another screen popped up on the Paladins' screens, depicting a cable and hook mechanism. "Our lions' got some tools that might come in handy. You guys thinking what I'm thinking?"

"One crustacean Maypole coming up!" Hunk caught onto Pidge's plan, keying in the commands to unlock the weapon.

The yellow Lion roared, before the inner workings of its' mouth glowed. Then a large hook appeared, silver, pronged and attached to a reel of thick wire. The other Paladins followed suit, with different designed hooks appearing in their Lions' mouths too.

"Why a Maypole though?" Keith wondered under his breath. He heard Shiro chuckle, and made a face. "What?"

"Nothing buddy." Shiro said, smiling despite the situation. "Let's just kick some robot butt."

Lance and Pidge were first to dive in, swinging around the claws twice before launching their hooks at it. Each managed to twirl around one leg before securing itself onto it. The two Lions flew diagonally past each other, crossing the two appendages beneath the crab-like creature's body. It screeched and pulled at the cables as hard as possible, tugging the two lions backwards.

"Uhh, a little help here guys!" Lance called out.

Keith throttled towards the thing, ramming his Lion's frame right at the centre of the metal body. No dent formed where he hit but the strength of the impact forced the Robeast downwards. Pidge and Lance yelped when their Lions were pulled back further.

"I said help us you loser!" Keith fumed as Lance made his insult. "Who's side are you on anyways?!"

That made Keith mad. "Don't you dare question my loyalty Lance!"

"Guys!" They quietened down at Shiro's bark. "Focus."

Keith gritted his teeth. 'Stupid Lance and his stupid mouth running a mile a minute', he thought.

Hunk came up next to him, the yellow Lion giving the red one a friendly nudge on the shoulder. "C'mon, Keith," Hunk grinned at the boy through the screen, "Let's make a meal out of this shell face."

While he didn't get the quip, he returned the smile. "Yeah, let's do it."

Red and yellow swooped downwards to where the Robeast was still struggling out of the tangle it was in. Their own hooks launched, hooking onto two more appendages. Manoeuvring underneath the monster, they managed to cross another pair of legs, effectively suspending it in mid-space.

"Team! When I get one of those claws down, we're making sure it won't budge again!" Shiro flew towards them, readying his hook. When it twirled around one claw and anchored, it clamped the pincers shut. He pulled a heavy right, bringing the claw around into a half-hug. "Let's tie this thing down."

The Lions flew into motion, each one pulling the wires along and about the still screaming Robeast. As the ticks passed and the last of the wire in the reel was used, they cut off their connections and formed up into formation, a little ways from the struggling Robeast. Once a mass of powerful limbs and diamond-hard shell, now nothing but a wrapped up piece of metal.

"Time to form Voltron guys."

Forming Voltron was one of the highlights of them being a team. It was a sense of togetherness, of unity, of coming together and then becoming one. There was a streamline of knowledge and understanding that passed into their minds, touching their consciousness, but never fully allowed to be delved deeper into. And each Paladin had a different sense of how they united together; of how they formed Voltron.

As she felt it, Pidge saw images of data flashing through her mind. A computer's mind, the deciphering of numbers and equations. There were bits of information on a malfunction here and the code of a programme functioning there. Data flew from one lion to another, trying to work itself out despite the different programmes running, specially for Voltron's formation.

For Hunk, it was the mechanisms and machinations of their robots themselves. Gears and cogs meshing along each other. A piston pushed into position, clamps grabbing hold onto it. The metal parts and pieces fitting together, some stored away, others broken up. All the little and big pieces connecting together to form the mighty Voltron.

Keith imagined, rather than saw. He imagined the feel of the flight through space. The drop of his stomach as he lurched forward with speed. The feel of the thrusters, hot as they burned through fuel. The rush of space dust in the vacuum around him, brushing along the outer plating of his Lion. The overall power and pace of Voltron.

Lance could sense the thoughts and emotions of the other Paladins. They were raw, broken and incoherent sentences. One stray phrase would cut off into another. Sometimes their feelings would spike through. Someone would feel excited and ready to go; another felt passive and patient, waiting and bidding their time. It gets all jumbled up when they finalise into Voltron though.

Shiro felt a connection with something...sentient. A pulse of thought, a sudden adrenaline burst; pain that flared from a hit taken to the hull of his Lion. Fear when he saw someone else spiral out of control. There were shouts of joy and worried calls. There was an approving presence at the back of his mind. Like five souls watching over him as they formed Voltron.

And as the last phase of their combination passes, the five pilots sense a harmony of different sensations. The mechanical components, the data analysed, the soulful and instinctual feelings that course through them.

Their connections to their five lions and their unity as Voltron.

"All right team," Shiro smiled, ready to win this battle. "Let's do this."

Keith locked his bayard into its holder, activating the sequence to unlock their blazing sword weapon. The sword appeared in hand, where the mouth of the red Lion was. Voltron gave a quick swing of the sword, testing its balance, before flying over to where the Robeast was.

"Goodbye Mr. Crabs!" Lance declared, as the large robot brought their sword up and swung it down right on top of the Robeast.

A bright flash enveloped them, blinding their on-board cameras and the ones connected to the castle-ship.

And then, the battle ended.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Characters/factions/items that were not mentioned in the Voltron franchise belong to me. I do not own any characters/factions/items that do belong to the Voltron franchise (e.g. Voltron Lions, Allura).

 **A/N:** Ahhh. Hi? Mm, well this was sort of impromptu, to be honest. I'm glad that people are interested in this story~ I'm sorry I haven't updated it in a long time. I blame school lol. Thank you for being patient with this story. Let's hope that this writing spree won't end anytime soon (or at all really).

Ahh, two more things: 1) I do not know how brain scans actually work, just the gist of it (might edit it so that it'll make more logical and irl sense),

2) I've only ever watched Voltron LD once and I'm a little fuzzy with the details so forgive me for that, it's been a long time.

* * *

 **Do Magic and Science Get Along Well?**

"What's happened?" Allura asked, concern skyrocketing as soon as the video screens whited out. "What's going on?"

"Not sure Princess." Coran answered, checking the conditions of the Lions' on board cameras. "Their cameras are in tip-top shape as far as I know."

"Find a way to filter through it Coran, we have to know if the Paladins are-"

Coran looked back when the Princess cut short. Then, seeing her worried expression, looked back at the monitors. The onboard cameras were still out but the castle's managed to clear up. Coran immediately toggled the controls to zoom in.

The Lions were adrift amongst scraps of metal, mostly intact with a few scratches and dents. The Robeast was gone; that much was gathered when a pincer floated past their view.

"Paladins! Paladins do you read me?" Static greeted them; Coran looked to Allura, shaking his head.

"Get the scanners working, I don't want any more surprises waiting for us." Allura ordered. "We're extracting our Paladins and Lions now."

As Coran navigated the ship, Allura left the CIC to prepare the med bay. Worry made her heart race faster but she stayed calm. They've been through rougher spots than these. They'll pull through and with a little bit of help from a helping pod, they'll be back on their feet. For now, the Paladins needed to get out of the danger zone and back on the ship.

At the back of her head and from the bottom of her heart though, something about this whole situation felt very, very wrong.

* * *

In another plane of space and time, at a far corner of the universe, a witch allowed herself to smile. Magic was rare now that the Alteans were gone and rarer still among the Galrans and their love for technology. It was only fortunate that the king himself saw benefit in magic, and thus employed her into his service and schemes.

That allowed her to toy and experiment: weaving magic into creatures and making creatures into machines. There had been thousands already she's sure, thousands of failed projects and thousands of glorious products. Her favourite had escaped, however, and she's constantly annoyed by it. But no matter; she would have him in her hold again soon.

She refocused her attention towards the small crustacean species struggling in their confinement, a small box with a field that would electrocute them if they ventured too close. She's already taken one out for a small plan in hobbling the Paladins. The spell she's engraved into that creature-turned-monster days ago, should have activated itself by now. A simple destructive blow would be all it took to mess with the Paladins.

Magic was a curious thing, she agreed. It could be very warm and bright; it could be very dark and dangerous too. It could fold time and bend space. It could delve deep into minds, reform flesh into something new.

And with what her magic could do to the Paladins? Haggar let out a shrill laughter at the thought.

It could destroy them at their very souls.

* * *

The Lions were damaged but that was to be expected. The hangars automatically sprang to life once Allura and Coran brought the Paladins out of their cockpits. Scanners detected for extensive ones, to decide if a part needed replacing or if a virus needed to be purged. Arms would automatically descend from the high walls to pick apart at the armour plates and the small screws in the joints. There was no need to fuss over the Lions for now.

The humans, however, were a different story. Once they were pulled back in, there hadn't been a single response from them. And when they opened the hatch to their cockpits, each one of them was unconscious. Not even Coran's Ceremonial Mating Dance of the Juju Rex Bird could wake them.

At this point, Allura couldn't help but panic. What had that explosion done to them? There was no trace of a physical injury to them; mental perhaps? They had to be taken to the healing pods quick then.

The Alteans placed the humans on medical beds and wheeled them into the infirmary. Each one stripped of their uniforms and into the scrubs, then placed into the care of he pods.

Coran, manning the controls to the pods, checked for their vital signs.

"Everything seems fine your Highness." He reported. "Heart rate, breathing rate, though their centrifugal gland rate is down to zero, so humans must not have those. Physically, they're intact as well, not including any cuts or bruises attained."

Allura had been standing in front of the pods, watching the Paladins. Her arms were crossed, with a hand up and holding her chin. "What about their minds?" She asked, gazing at each of their faces. "What's the activity like for their brain waves?"

Coran swiped at the touch monitor, bringing up the reports in their brain activities. He checked over each Paladin's, scrutinising at the different numbers and graphs that were being shown.

"Odd. Their brain waves are...odd, your Highness."

Allura whirled around. "How do you mean?"

Coran shrugged, not in a lax or careless manner. He really didn't know. "Compared to the brain scans we first took during a check up, these ones are...different. Good different though!"

A video screen appeared at the side, projected so that Allura can see the scans too. She took a look at them carefully, so that nothing seemed amiss and that she wouldn't miss it. From what she's learnt from the human medical training Pidge had downloaded, they were relatively normal. Save for a change in the patterns from their regular ones...

She sighed. "I suppose...we won't know until they wake up."

The screen disappeared and the pods' monitors dimmed, though the background programme still ran in order to record their time in-pod and report any strange or dangerous changes. Coran walked around and up to where Allura was, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Chin up Princess." He smiled, his moustache lifting. "If they're fine, they'll be back on their feet in no time."

Allura smiled back at him. "You're right Coran. They're fine." She looked back at the Paladins and their sleeping forms. Somehow, though, their passive states didn't seem peaceful at all.

"They'll be fine."

* * *

In the hangar bay of the Castle of Lions, a machine whirred to life. It's onboard computer booted up, the cockpit within it lighting up. In the eyes of its form, thousands of minuscule diodes brightened and the number of cameras positioned in it switched on. It saw where it was, and catalogued it into a corner of its memory storage unit. It's matrix ran hundreds of programmes at the same time, a mind in the machine.

 _It?_

The coherent thought had formed from a peculiar data stream within the matrix. The strangeness of the data- unknown and unneeded- had the anti-virus software immediately spring to action. It attacked the data, trying to purge it out. But there was something wrong- something strong- a firewall of some form- that denied any action onto it. So the software began the process to shut the matrix down.

The lights in the eyes of the Lion dimmed, and it went quietly back to sleep.


End file.
